As some of you know, I recently got my old job back working as a waitress at "Da Pineapple Grill" to help earn some extra cash. It was not our first choice of things to do, but we felt it was what was right for our family at the time. It was stressful and hard, but provided us with some money to tide us over. So many times I'd come home late with my feet just killing me and I'd sit next to Richie and think, 'One day, I won't have to go to work and that will be awesome" or in other words, "then, I'll be happy." Long story short I was semi-forced to quit this past week. I know we always have a choice, but the female owner didn't like me too much and just stopped scheduling me because she was afraid that if she fired me, she'd have to pay me unemployment. So I ended up quitting because it just wasn't worth it. So I should be breathing a sigh of relief, right? Yay! I don't have to go to work at night anymore!! Right? Well, although it is nice, I'm not 10 times happier than I was before, like I expected.
My point is, I seemed to always be trapped in thinking that I would be happier if "this" just happened, or one day when we get "this", I won't worry so much, or if I had only done "this" before I was married, I would have so much more of "this". It seems to be a chronic illness, akin to what the Bernstein Bears like to call the "Gimmies".
I've had this quote up for as long as I can remember to help me with this condition, and it looks like I'll have it up for quite a long time more. Maybe one day, when I'm finally over the "gimmies", I can finally take down this quote. ;)
"For a long time it seemed to me that life was about to begin-real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life. This perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. So treasure every moment you have and remember that time waits for no one. Happiness is a journey, not a destination"
-Souza
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September 2022
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9 comments:
I bet you would be happier if you had just quit on your own and didn't feel somewhat "forced." Feeling under appreciated always leaves a bad taste in the mouth. Which takes a little while to get over. I really like your quote. Don't think you're the only one who suffers from the "gimmies." I have yet to meet anyone who isn't a little excited for the day when....
Ah, so true. I have to constantly remind myself that happiness is a choice and a habit that I have to work to create. Thanks for sharing the quote!!! (And by the way, I can't even imagine someone not liking you!)
The protective "mama bear" instinct has surfaced and I have a thing or two to I'd like to say to your ex-boss! But I will stifle myself, and instead congratulate you on your attitude. I'm sure one day you'll totally conquer the "I'll be happy when...." syndrome, and I hope I'm right there with you!
before i was married the best advice anyone ever game me was "don't wait to be happy" I wish it was easier to follow! (oh, and i really can't imagine that anyone would not like you, it's not possible! lol)
You have an admirable attitude, at the same time it's perfectly fine to be angry with the way you were treated. Don't feel like you are not being Christlike either for being treated unfairly, and being disappointed. I don't think you have a case of the "gimmies." It sounds as though you have embraced you disappointment so that you can accept it and find happiness in your blessings.
I wanna see your mom tell your ex-boss a thing or two :) She's so nice, I can't imagine her saying anything rude! Anyways, It is hard to enjoy the journey, sometimes I resent it. But when I let the attitude go, or just resign myself to it being this way, I find my life really does make me happy, and right NOW! I'm sure you're much better at being cheerful than I am. I'm so lucky to have the optimistic spouse to wake up to every morning. :) Anyways, hey, ya got your evenings free! :)
Oh... I love you Rachel. Can I tell you I've suffered from the illness many times. Thank you for admitting to it! I don't feel so alone!!!
I too have suffered from this illness! Im sure something better is around the corner for you! Thanks so much for the comment on my blog! And thanks too for putting my blog button on your blog!!! So fun to meet new friends through the blogging world!!! Take care...
Tiffany
I told Mom not too long ago that I was sick of the phrase "finding joy in the journey" - I REALLY struggle with that... BUT I do love your quote and continue to look up to you little sis! Thanks for the photo it is on the fridge at the moment until I get it into a frame. Taysom wore your dress Sunday and received some compliments - Thanks for thinking of sending it our way! As we got out of the car and started walking toward the church building a breeze caught the flap of the dress that was wrapped around and ooopsie - skin was revealed... luckily, I was the only one who noticed!
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